So it takes me a while sometimes...I can be told something and not "get it" until I have first hand experience. For years I have joked around about how is it that perfectly normal mothers becoming full blown nut jobs? When my son was in his teens I had a theory that the kids do it to them it just takes a while to fully develop. All those years of worry and stress. I've thought it had to be just luck of the draw, on the outside other peoples mothers seem to be OK. But the older I get the more I realize everyone's mother after a certain age is F****N Nuts!
Now I have heard people, men, whisper about "OH NO! menopause.! I have exactly 2 blog followers one male....cue all the male readers leaving, I just lost half my readership on my second post. I was under some airy fairy misconception that it was a natural thing that most women go through and just was a wonderful life change leading us from those child bearing years into the "Golden Years."
Golden years my ass...seeing red....having empathy for justified homicide years more like!
I read a book where the author used the mystery story to "expose" the use of pregnant mare urine in making a drug for menopause. Premarin, get it? I was OUTRAGED! why would anyone even consider penning up a preggo mare and catching her urine...but more so what complete nut case would use it? That is just GROSS!
Houston we have a problem! You go enough nights waking up to a towering inferno that moments before was called your bed, you get to thinking anything is a good idea. All those years you told your kid not to stand in the refrigerator door and "look" well forget that, stand in the freezer door instead!
I'm thinking it must have been a relative of a menopausal woman that was desperate and started thinking what would have the highest concentration of hormones and how do I get it?... came up with... I know the horse is pregnant.....I could harvest the horses pee and get mom to drink it! that might do it! What once was an unbelievable, crazy, cruel, idea started to get an eyebrow lift, a hummmm?
You read a medication warning label that says may increase your risk of cancer, stroke and heart attack and......... YOU DON"T CARE. You take a chance of becoming a side show attraction just to feel like you felt a couple of months ago. Somehow you know the whole bearded lady thing will counter act the up side of the hormone but what the hell??
And there it is, cue the divine angel singing noise, you get to a point with the whole hormone leaving you like a 20 year old bunny leaving a Heff and it all becomes clear, granted it is through a red fog, THAT is what happens to moms! Menopause!
I don't know when it really goes full blown, to many variables here, children, stress, what the hell ever, but at some point after loosing enough hormones a mom LOOSES "IT!" Ever heard of a young "crazy cat lady?" NO! why? because the crazy comes after the hormones leave! Ever see a lady out in something too skimpy and revealing and think "what the hell is she thinking?" She is thinking if I fake young maybe I won't loose "IT" completely.
My mother the past couple of weeks has pulled a couple of doozies that directly effect me. ( affect, effect one of her favorite pet peeves the mis use of them...I don't care!) Now! I get why she moved hundreds of miles away form her mother, son it's not to late get out NOW! I used to think why is she so crazy? I know now!
I used to have a journal, it got me into all kinds of trouble, you would think I would keep my thoughts locked up in my own little head and never write anything down much less send it out into webhell, but there you go another example of crazy. May this make one hormone lacking woman crack a smile today!
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